Night in The City

"None of this happened because were special, we were just dropped in while everything was moving so fast because the universe doesn't care it just does what it does" -Misquoted Mae, Night In The Woods

Dear World,

I'm not really sure what any of us expect when we grow older, I guess we just feel bitter because everything hurts, some of us grow up thinking that the world is good, some of us grow up never knowing that at all, and yet in the end we all feel the same sort of pain. Like things aren't like they should be, like pain is a bad thing and its true to an extent i believe,

the injustice of this world is apparent in everything we do, everything we see... for some thats a reason to seek out a meaning, like a higher power, for others a reason to feel like nothing matters at all and we may as well just give up.

I think in a way were all right. but i think what really matters is that we did feel pain; because honestly if there were no bad times how would the good times even matter? they would just be times. Maybe I'm just affected by the game I'm referencing in the title or maybe I'm just looking at this again with a new light. Maybe we don't matter at least to the world, to the universe... maybe everyone just exists because they do. But we certainly matter to others, and others matter to us, thats why things hurt. Why mental illness exists, because at the end of the day if it didn't hurt if nothing reminded you, that you existed and that there was a difference between the good and bad, it trully wouldnt matter.

We make decisions everyday, and of course theres the logic and the paradoxes that imply there is no choice, that choice and freedom are illusions, yet we still put meaning and thought into them, because we know things are going to turn out differently if only slightly. Sometimes we choose the choices that will make it all hurt, other times we seek the decisions that will put out the least pain. But in the end, I don't think I'd ever want things to never hurt. I don't think without the pain I'd be who I am, without the bad times I'd never learn, never understand never get the feeling that things mean something more. 

But hey, Maybe I'm wrong, maybe utopia would be a good thing... but maybe im right and the pursuit of happiness is worth a lot more than the attainment. Thats just how I see it, Life With Me.

Sincerely Yours,

Mjax Majoran